De La Guerra Y Pacheco triumphantly returns to the Porter Ranch, Huasna, on September 24, 25, and 26, after a long clampless spell. Join in the fraternity and frivolity and chow down on the clampchefs’ Friday beans and bread, Saturday Humbug’s weenie and sirloin dinner, and Sunday breakfast. There will be a cast iron cookoff, a raffle, and a Golden Hills ceremony celebrating our recently departed brethren. The ranch has miles of hiking and biking, but keep in mind that high fire danger rules are in effect
Schedule of Events
FRIDAY, SEPTEMBER 24
12:15 Land grab – check in with the GDR and stake your claim
3:02 Beer flowing
5:11 Bar pouring
6:24 Cast Iron Cook-off grub judged and served to them that paid, beans and bread ready for all
SATURDAY, SEPTEMBER 25
Clamp luck breakfast – on your own
8:14 PBC’s report to the Hangman
12:09 Humbug’s Weenie served
5:10 To the Hall of Comparative Ovations
7:01 Clampbanquet served
SUNDAY, SEPTEMBER 26
8:33 Breakfast is served
8:59 It’s Raffle Time
12:15 Finish cleanup, pack up and move to the next digits
To get to the Porter Ranch, head east from US 101 on Highway 166, from the intersection just north of Santa Maria. After about 9 miles turn left (north) at the ECV 1.5 sign onto Alamo Creek Road and follow the ECV 1.5 signs – it’s about 4 miles in to the clampsite.
The Fine Print
No orphans (2 or 4 legged), no guns, knives, explosives, weapons of any kind, illegal or controlled substances. The presence of prohibited items jeopardizes our chapter charter; enforcement will be by all officers of the chapter and violators will be escorted off the premises.
HIGH FIRE DANGER rules are in effect: no open fires, no dirt bikes or other fuel burning vehicles outside the clampsite.
Let a brother of sobriety take the reins on the road.
There are two, equally indignant, Routes to Clamptenment!
1. Pony Express Trail
2. Digital Super Highway
This is the enlightened path and you are wise to seek it.
Unfortunately, it’s a work in progress and
this road is temporarily closed.