Perozzi Ranch San Luis Obispo

September 13 – 15, 6029

The Hewgag Brays

Our Noble Grand Humbug, Steve “Porta-Palace” Chaves,
AL‑XXXV, sounds the Hewgag announcing another opportunity
to experience the  1100 acre Perozzi Ranch and yet another
unforgettable 3 days and 2 nights of fraternal gesticulation
among the bibulous brotherhood of equal indignity.

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Particulars

F r i d a y
11:55 Sign in with the GDR. Pick up the Badge of the Day
and Histerical Keepsake. Stake your clampsite.
3:07 The beer kegs are tapped.
4:07 Chapter Mercantile selling a limited edition of
the official commemorative doins shirt and a
multitude of Clamper emblazonment.
4:37 Cast Iron Poticipants check in with the Chief Judge.
6:01 Beans and bread for all Clampers, willing and able.
6:15 Cast Iron Cookoff fare served to grub stub holders.
7:07 Movie selections from the library of Mysterious Moe Van Huss.
S a t u r d a y
6:50 Clamp-luck (good luck… you are on your own) breakfast.
8:36 PBCs report to the hangman.
10:22 Chapter Mercantile open for business.
12:11 Humbug’s weenie with all the fixin’s, by “Corn Dog” Johnny Sfera.
4:26 The Hall of Comparative Ovations commences.
6:15 ClampBanquet served. First class all the way.
7:07 Movie selections scoured from the depths of cyberspace.
8:47 Ad Hoc Cacophonous ClampFire Concerto. Bring Instruments!
S u n d a y
8:32 Breakfast served.
9:46 Raffle drawing.
10:36 Golden Hills Ceremony.
12:01 Clean up and pack trash and recyclables with you.

Raffle Prizes

Raffle Prizes will be a mix of new and recycled merchandise. Anyone with some
cool stuff long forgotten in the attic should haul it out and donate it to Sunday’s
Breakfast Raffle. Raffle Tickets will be sold by roving rafflemeisters Friday and Saturday.

The Historic Perozzi Ranch

The Perozzi Ranch, founded in 19o3, is an 1100 acre working cattle ranch.
It operated as the Tuna Dairy Ranch for about 50 years, named for the particular
type of cactus that grew in abundance. Other uses included wheat and hay farming.

Directions

From the US-101, exit Los Osos Valley Rd and head Southeast.
That’s a right turn if you are coming from the South and a left turn otherwise.
Use the left 2 lanes to turn left onto S Higuera St (0.4 mi)
Turn right onto Tank Farm Rd (2.3 mi)
At the traffic circle, continue straight to stay on Tank Farm Rd (0.5 mi)
At the next traffic circle, continue straight onto Orcutt Rd. (0.5 mi)
The Perozzi Ranch is at 4400 Orcutt Rd, on the left.
Follow the signs.

FUNCTIONARIES

Tim Mason, Dustin DeBrum, Jason Haines, Thad Haines, Greg Hawkins, Tad Hillier,
Mark Jorgeson, Pete Kelley, Dennis Philbin, Craig Shannon, Gabriel Miossi
BROTHERS OF THE BOARD

Rudy Castillo will be preparing all of the traditional meals.
Humbugs Winnie Roast, Saturday banquet & Sunday breakfast.

Get ‘Er Done!

Heed the call of the hewgag and step up to help out with the fall doins. The humbug
is looking for a few good clampers whose talents will fulfill the distinct and rewarding duties necessary for clamptentment for all. Those brave and willing personages should seek out and avail themselves to the Humbug or BoB.

Cast Iron Cookoff

Kicking off the weekend doins is the Friday Night Cast Iron Cook-Off, judged by
a select set of experienced gastronomes. The winning contender will be awarded
the coveted, perpetual “Flying Pig” trophy. The award ceremony will not consist of a
Certificate of Merit nor involve any cash bestowed upon the winning chef d’fer,
but may include being photographed (only after returning the trophy to the
chapter trailer for safe keeping),

New and exciting cook-off developments.
All proceeds collected from those who wish to savor the cast iron fare, will be divided equally
among the participating cooks in an effort to defray costs and encourage competitive spirit.
All Cast iron entries must be cooked on the coals not in your clamp abode or
home. All contestants should gather with the Humbug at 4 on Friday afternoon.

The Fine Print

No open flame ground fires of any kind. There is one central fire ring for Cast
Iron Cook-off and disposal of ashes. No motorcycles; no orphans (2-, 3- or 4-legged); no guns, knives, explosives, or weapons of any kind; no illegal or controlled substances. The presence of prohibited items jeopardizes our chapter charter; enforcement will be by all officers of the chapter and violators will be escorted off the premises. Let a brother of sobriety take the reins.

THE RUB

The Rub varies with the costs of Clampsite access and proximity to services for table, chair, and toilet rentals. Your gold dust pays for stuff like: your very own Badge-of- the-Day, stocking our hosted bar with premium beer and liquor, jockey box rental, ice, big and little slippery, an exceptional multi-course gastronomic experience, firewood, bribes, signs, printing, insurance, the web site, and a bunch of stuff you don’t really want to know about. But most importantly it is for the collective funding of an historic plaque!

$141.50 per Red Shirt, if your GoldDust is received by 09/06/24.
($151.50 if unregistered & paying at the door).
$151.50 per PBC, if received by 09/06/24.
($161.50 per unregistered PBC paying at the door.)

REGISTRATION IS CLOSED!

NOTE CRITICAL CUT-OFF DATE: Friday, 9/06/24.